and so, i am in england, potentially temporary, perhaps next week i will be in africa – perhaps paris? berlin? – for now i am in england looking out through the windows of the conservatory into the garden of my uncle mike’s house. i hadn’t seen my family here for 12 years. the last time i saw my 2 aunties, 2 uncles and 5 cousins from my mothers side I was 11 years old.
so cousin esther had a wedding – they said they love each other and sang the lord, we drank wine, aunt sue took a bottle away before they cleaned up, we danced a ceilidh, they danced to a cover band. next day cousin dan and i drank coffee while they went to church. the house has now dispersed, some to greece, esther and pete went on their honeymoon to cuba, joseph is here for summer and i remain. to unpack my belongings from my back pack, to watch a dvd, to make endless cups of tea, to walk freely, to spend british pounds and listen to the british accent, to make my own meals for breakfast, lunch and dinner, to feed the cats, to repair my technical belongings, to stare out the window of trains at the summer rain of england and the old houses whizzing by, to not mind because it’s lovely to wear a jumper and have rain around. thunder and lightening too. to wander the trails around haywards heath across the empty fields and into the woods so dark-so dark, no wonder they made tales of goblins in them and fairy tales about them.., past the cottages, past the english houses with steeped roofs..
– so i am gathering my bits and pieces, writing applications, looking for grants, looking for funding, looking for work, going through photographs, video and audio, saying hello to loved ones far away. missing people, feeling content, feeling transient, answering the telephone and talking to strangers, taking messages, thinking about a train to london…thinking about visas, thinking about to-do lists, thinking about here and there.